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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24432790">i'd like to (keep you on your toes)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/vix_vivere/pseuds/vix_vivere'>vix_vivere</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fairy Tail</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bottom Natsu Dragneel, Boys' Love, Feels, Gratsu - Freeform, Gray Fullbuster - Freeform, Idiots in Love, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Mutual Pining, Natray - Freeform, Natsu Dragneel - Freeform, Probably ooc, Top Gray Fullbuster, gray is a sweetie pie, set after the alvarez arc</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 08:14:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,540</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24432790</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/vix_vivere/pseuds/vix_vivere</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Gray doesn't count. He doesn't count the years or the months or the days.</p><p>But if he did count, it would be just over three years. If he did count, it would be about 40 months. If he did count, it would be exactly one thousand two hundred twenty three days since he fell in love. </p><p>But Gray doesn’t count.</p><p>(set after the alvarez arc)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Natsu Dragneel/Gray Fullbuster</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>77</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>i'd like to (keep you on your toes)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>Gray waits inside the bar.</p><p>Other than Macao and Wakaba sitting in one of the guild booths talking away and Cana up at the bar with a barrel, Gray’s the only one there drinking before noon. He alternates between keeping his eyes on the guild entrance and watching one of the men puff out smoke out of a cigar as the two of them whisper to each other in between slow sips of whiskey.</p><p>He orders himself a beer, whatever they have on the tap.</p><p>Gray has grown up to be agreeable, all yes ma’am and no sir and half smiles and polite chuckles. He thinks that Natsu probably wouldn't remember the little changes or how he used to be, but figures it fair because Gray forgets things about him too.</p><p>Sometimes, he spends nights beneath his scratchy bed sheets and tries to remember all the details of Natsu's boyish face. He tries to remember if his nose slopes up or if his freckles lazily trail past his cheeks and up to his ears. Gray never gets it quite right, everything always ends up just a little bit fuzzy, but his belly still feels aching and warm and always feels a bit hot. He immediately flushes at the memory and quickly tries to direct his thoughts towards something else. Stupid feelings.</p><p>Stupid.</p><p>Taking a sip of his beer, Gray shifts his eyes from Macao and Wakaba and back again to the guild entrance. Whatever they have on tap turns out to be a bit more bitter than he’s used to and he holds it uncomfortably in his mouth before he swallows, the thick foam curling around his tongue. Licking his lips, he carefully sets the beer on the bar, the cold glass slip-sliding beneath his fingers.</p><p>He’s late.</p><p>He’s always late.</p><p>Of course, Natsu would make him wait five seconds or five minutes or five hours, just because he knows that he would.</p><p>Natsu’s always late and Gray's always waiting.</p><p>When Natsu finally does walk through the door, he throws his hand up in a wave, the corners of his mouth turn up and just like that, he’s forgiven. Gray smirks back in response. If the way he has to keep in contact with Natsu is by fighting, then so be it.</p><p>“Hey, Flame Brain.”</p><p>“Tsk, Icicle.”</p><p>Gray’s not sure if Natsu’s ever said his name out loud. He’s not sure if Natsu’s ever stretched his lips low and wide around the one small syllable. It’s always some sort of insult. Always. But if that's the way it has to be, then so be it.</p><p>Sliding onto the bar stool next to him, Natsu looks down at Gray's half-empty bottle of beer, and then looks back up, confused. Gray pushes the glass back and forth across the countertop, leaving behind a sluggish trail of condensation, but Natsu keeps looking and Gray can feel his cheeks burn pink under the heated gaze.</p><p>“What?” he asks.</p><p>“You drink now?” His mouth settles into a smirk and with a quirk of his brow, he adds, “You're old enough to drink?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Gray responds, and then takes a small sip as if he has to prove that he’s not lying. “For awhile now.”</p><p>“Huh,” he remarks. “Then we should celebrate!”</p><p>Gray laughs. It's nice when the talk with their words and not their fists for a change. “It was a year ago.”</p><p>“Well, better late than never.”</p><p>“Sure,” Gray agrees, surprisingly. “Let’s celebrate.”</p><p>With a raise of his hand, Natsu catches the Mira’s attention, signalling his order. When it arrives (a soda, since he doesn't drink too often), he takes a long and slow swallow, draining the glass by half. Then, almost as an afterthought, he tips his glass against Gray, clanking them together.</p><p>“To the boy who is old enough to drink,” he says through a grin. “So, you're all grown up?”</p><p>“Yep. Happens that way sometimes.”</p><p>“Yeah,” he says, nodding his head in agreement.</p><p>Gray smiles, almost shyly, with his thumb thoughtfully tucked between his teeth.</p><p>“You stayed the same, I think.”</p><p>Natsu finishes his soda with another long swallow, tipping his chin back as he drains the glass, before wiping the back of his hand across his mouth. He grins. “Happens that way sometimes.”</p><p>It wasn't even a couple moments later that they were brawling and punching each other again, the vicious cycle that it is.</p><p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>Natsu grew up pretty, Gray muses one day: pink cheeks and large smiles. Or maybe that's who Natsu always was.</p><p>Gray misses Natsu even when he's right next to him.</p><p>And Gray loves him and thinks about him, but mostly, Gray just misses him. All the time. He wants to be with Natsu. All the time. It's pathetic. Loving Natsu is his biggest strength, but also his biggest weakness. Natsu is the only thing that can tear him down, and the only thing that can bring him up again. He wants to bring Natsu inside the beautiful wreck of his heart, into his life, which burned the day they met. Natsu burned it all down.</p><p>And Gray loves him. Maybe a little too much (never too much).</p><p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>When Gray opens the door to the hotel room the team in staying in for a mission, Natsu literally jumps up to greet them (Erza wouldn't let him go to pick up all their luggage from the lobby). Lucy waves from the doorway and her and Erza go and start organizing the luggage in the limited amount of space the room offers. </p><p>And Gray wants to run over and pick Natsu up and swing him around, show him off for the pretty thing that he is, but he doesn’t think that’s something he's allowed to do, so he just puts a smirk on his face, his hands shoved deep into his pockets.</p><p>And Natsu grins even wider, and, man, Gray really does love him.</p><p>Natsu takes a step towards him, putting his hands on Gray's chest with a curious look on his face. Gray can feel his face flush, but Natsu either doesn’t notice or doesn’t mind, because he just smiles up at him. </p><p>“I always forget how tall you are,” Natsu says, his hands slowly going back to his sides, stepping a little closer until their shoes touch. He narrows his eyes, suspiciously. “Sure you don’t just keep growing?”</p><p>“Yeah, pretty sure.” At this point, Gray doesn't even think he's breathing anymore, his throat constricted and tight and awkward with Natsu so close. </p><p>“Well,” Natsu says, smiling, “Maybe I’m just smaller.”</p><p>Tugging a hand out of his pocket, Gray decides to be brave as he curls fingers around Natsu's.</p><p>“Nah, same old Natsu.”</p><p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>Natsu and Gray stay behind when Erza and Lucy leave to go pick up dinner.</p><p>They sit quietly on the bed, side-by-side, Natsu with his elbows on his knees and his chin on his fist while Gray stares at his hands laying in his lap.</p><p>“They're late,” Natsu says.</p><p>Gray starts at the sound of his voice. He sounds a lot quieter than he remembers. Maybe he’s forgotten things about him too. But when he turns to look at Natsu, he’s exactly as remembered: all boyishly handsome with his mouth set in a kind smile and his brow in a half-serious furrow.</p><p>His hair is longer though, Gray notes, the ends curling up at the collar of his vest and beneath his jaw. Gray has the sudden urge to touch it, to push the soft curls off of his forehead and behind his ears, to kiss his lips after he does. So Gray reaches out with a newfound confidence and takes a strand between thumb and pointer finger. Natsu turns to him, a little startled, unsuspecting of the sudden affectionate attention from his rival. </p><p>“You grew it out. It’s nice,” Gray clarifies, shoulders up in a small shrug. “I like it.”</p><p>Natsu reaches up to hold Gray's thumb against his palm, resting they're fingers together until eventually knotting them together. The tension in the room is strong and Gray knows what the tender look in Natsu's eyes mean. They know what's coming next.  </p><p>“I missed you,” Gray confesses.</p><p>“Me too.”</p><p>“You didn’t have to leave,” he says. “Not just because of what happened with Tartaros. It could have just been you and me.”</p><p>Hours of them together, just being themselves, he thinks. Natsu just stares, eyes full of want and longing and intimacy. "You know why I did."</p><p>“Well, you’re back now,” Gray says, unsure. He touches his free hand to Natsu's cheek and asks, “Can I kiss you?”</p><p>And Natsu, destructively clumsy with his heart on his sleeve, smiles big and bright and says, “Of course.”</p><p>So Gray presses his mouth to Natsu and tangles his hands in his hair to pull her closer.</p><p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>(Natsu rides him slowly, keeping his hands held on Gray's shoulders as he moves up and down over him and Gray lazily (sweetly, even) mouths at his neck.</p><p>“Do you love me?”</p><p>He grins up at Natsu, kind of earnestly happy, and then catches his lips in a sudden kiss.</p><p>“Always.”)</p><p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>Gray wishes that time could stand still, like a broken watch.</p><p>Instead, he kisses Natsu and starts counting.</p><p> </p><p>...</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>It was my birthday a week ago and somehow I feel sad and lonely for no reason lmao. also this is probably kinda out of character oops</p></blockquote></div></div>
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